30 Days to Taming Your Tongue - What you say (and don't say) will improve your relationships by Deborah Smith Pegues
--I'm sure that after reading The Whole Story you can understand why I didn't get to this yesterday, but I'll get caught up.--
Day Twenty-Five - The Accusing Tongue
The accuser of our brothers, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down - Revelation 12:10
Have you ever charged someone with wrong-doing before you established evidence of his guilt? When you do so, you fall into the same pattern as Satan, the official accuser of God's children.Emotional and spiritual maturity dictate that you must seek first to understand rather than making an accusation. Look at the example God set in the Garden of Eden when Adam and Eve blew it. He could have easily said, "Adam and Eve, you ungrateful sinners, I should never have trusted you in my garden!" God's non-accusatory style in confronting Adam and Eve about their trespass provides a powerful model for those of us who tend to accuse before obtaining all the facts of the matter.
Then the Lord God called Adam and said to him, "Where are you?" So he said, "I heard Your voice in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; and I hid myself." And He said, "Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I commanded you that you should not eat?" - Genesis 3:9-11
Now one can't help but note that God already knew the answer to each of the three questions He asked Adam. Notwithstanding, He gave Adam an opportunity to explain his behavior. Asking a clarifying question and listening to the response are key steps in overcoming an accusing tongue. I repeat, ask, and listen.
Has anyone ever accused you falsely? Have your motives been called into question when you knew they were pure? How should you respond to such injustice? Well, the first step is to ask God's guidance as to whether to proclaim your innocence and the best way to do so. If the lie has affected someone, you might explain to that person that the accusation is simply not true. You have no control over whether or not they believe you. Also, if you are not certain who the perpetrator is, do not waste your energy trying to find the source of the lie. Know that all lies originate with Satan. Period.
With God's help, today I will tune my ears to wisdom and concentrate on understanding. I will cry out for insight and understanding. I will search for them as I would for lost money or hidden treasure.